Programs

 How To Be A Burden to              Your Kids

      The Gift of Years

    Thank God, We're              Miserable

 The "Oy" and Joy of Caregiving

   Didn't My Skin                 Used To Fit?

          Aging with Humor

I've Survived Damn   Near Everything

Strong At the Broken Places

 When the Heart                 Weeps

     Making Loss Matter

 Too Soon Old, Too              Late Smart

   When am I Old Enough to Know    Better?

Quotes for Meshuganas

Bring Me a Sane Man and I will cure him for you. Carl Jung

A sane response to an insane situation is insane. R.D. Laing

God is a comedian playing to an audience that is afraid to laugh -Voltaire

The only fool bigger than one who knows it all is the one who argues with him

 The only people I know who are happy are those I don't know well.

The monkey may be off your back, but the circus never leaves town. Anne Lamott


Tools for "Suffering In Style."

Resign As General Manager of the Universe

Live in the Moment

Schedule Joy in Your Life

Think Like an Optimist

Think about Thinking

                                    Life Changing Books

A Gift from the Sea - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

If You Meet the Buddha On the Road, Kill Him- Sheldon Kopp, MD

Man's Search for Meaning -Viktor Frankl, MD

The Road Less Travelled - M. Scott Peck, MD

When Bad Things Happen To Good People - Rabbi Harold J Kushner

Less is More the Paradox of Choice - Barry Schwartz

The Search for Momma and the Meaning of Life- Irvin Yalom, MD

Flying Without Wings Personal Reflections on Being Disabled - Arnold Beisser, MD



« My Year Of Living Imperfectly | Main | Thank God, We're Miserable The Joy and Oy of Caregiving »
Sunday
Dec262010

A Gift of Lovingkindness

As this time of year triggers the “remembered happiness” of holidays past, Gretchen Rubin’s quote that “the days are long but the years are short” is powerfully true. Our “experienced happiness” is often very different as we are caught in our private “Groundhog Day” with the same family struggles and disappointments over and over. Remember holiday blues is the feeling of loss you have when you can’t be with those people who matter and holiday stress is when you have to be with those people.

 I’m reminded of the story of 2 children who are playing in the sandbox and they get into a fight and say “I’m never going to be your friend” they run to their mothers are comforted, then return to play - friends again. One mother says “how do they do that?” The other explains they’re more into happiness than they are into righteousness. How many times have we chosen to be “right” rather than happy? One of the best definitions I’ve heard for forgiveness is giving up our need for a happy past.

 According to the Talmud, repentance was among the first things God created; even before God created the physical universe. Think about that - before the world was created God knew we would need to repent.

 This year when my house fell apart I began studying Jewish mysticism and Buddhism not just to understand life but to “stand life.”  I’m now grateful for my floors, ceilings, plumbing, etc. It is the little things - there are no ordinary moments. The worst thing would be to be happy and not know it.

 So this year give yourself the gift of mindfulness - living each moment with awareness and without judgment . We need to learn to forgive ourselves over and over and over and over and over. God knows.  

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